The Vampire, cont…

So, I realized this blog was supposed to be about good AND bad dating stories and so far it only includes the horrifying.  I’m sitting here trying to think of a good story and I can’t.  Literally cannot.  Dates make me so uncomfortable.  I hate going on them.  I’m always super self conscious and nervous so therefore can’t be myself.  The One never actually even TOOK me on a date but even when we were out in groups I was so afraid he wouldn’t like me that I would become a completely different person.

I would actually say the best date I ever had was my first one with the Vampire, which apparently turned out not to be one because he was dating someone else.  Yeah, I’m that awesome.

I have been going through old e-mails and chats I had with him and they were ridiculous.  He actually emailed me a picture of himself in his boxers AFTER he told me he was dating other people and just wanted to be friends.  But that didn’t stop him from wanting to add me to his apparent collection of pictures from girls dumb enough to send them.  Then I stopped talking to him until he groveled.  Lather, rinse, repeat.

Here is an actual excerpt from one of our convos:

I think fuck buddies should have a few more degrees of separation than you and I do.  If we didn’t know each other as well as we do, I wouldn’t have a problem with it. But hanging out + fuck buddies = dating.

Less than a week earlier: I’m sick and can’t come over to make you feel good after your long day.

So you can understand my confusion, yes?